Is it easy for you to meet people? Do you have many friends? Or are you one of those who somehow always seems to be on the outside looking in; one of those who spends most of your evenings alone, wondering why life is passing you by?

It is a strange paradox, that with millions of people surrounding us, and even with all our modern aids to communication, so many of us find it difficult to form close relationships, difficult to find that special 'partner'. It is much harder for those who are shy by nature, and for these people, those lonely evenings can stretch into lonely years. It was a telephone conversation with a friend of mine in Canada the other day that started me thinking about this. For he is one such person; now in his early thirties, intelligent and hard-working, and the man for whom the word 'yasashii' could have been invented, he would be a perfect partner for somebody. But ... he is simply too shy. And so he waits ... and waits, for 'something' to happen.

I suppose in earlier times, people like that would have found partners easily, or I should perhaps say, partners would have been found for them. In those days, the local matchmakers were always busy at work, and people too timid or unable to make their own arrangements were 'helped out' by the community. I have no idea whether partnerships created by matchmaking were happier than other types, but have no doubt that many people found partners this way who would otherwise never have been able to do so.

That is pretty much in the past though. In these huge and impersonal cities in which we now live, each one of us is left to 'sink or swim' as best we can. For some, finding a partner is easy, and they will be wondering why I am even writing about such things; but others ... those sitting alone in their quiet rooms reading this ... they will understand.

A large part of this problem is that different generations now live in very 'segregated' communities. In older times, people of all ages lived and worked in constant association with each other, either in small villages or in local neighbourhoods in a larger city, but these days we have almost no contact with members of other generations. Those people who would naturally play a match-making role are simply not 'there'. A solution to this dilemma will not appear until we reorganize our way of living to restore our missing sense of community.

But I don't suppose that will be happening soon. In the meantime, there my friend waits, and somewhere, I don't know where, there waits the woman who should be his partner ... How to get them together?